Depression Is A Rainbow

Colour me depressed
Red-
Is for the raging anger
Burning like a furnace,
At you,
Him,
Me, Myself  and I. 
That can go off like a time bomb at anytime
And direction misfires shooting anyone 
In its path.
I don't know how to turn it off,
Or how to flick the switch 
So that the calming haze will fall.
And sorry 
Seems to be salt in these open wounds 
Caused by my callus tongue.

Colour me depressed
Yellow-
Is for the little ray of sunshine
That pushes through 
The dark thoughts that twist and turn
Inside the cortex lobes.
It is for the colour of my skin,
Endless nights etched into the grooves
Of my painted canvas
Each crease beneath my eyes 
A night where sleep would not come.

Colour me depressed
Pink-
Pink is the sound  of the laughter 
That bubbles up out my tired smile.
On those rare days
When the old me came to visit
It is also the veins in the white of my eyes 
Where lack of sleep -
And stress lay grooves of blood 
Into my vision,
And opened the gate to floods
of salted tears.

Colour me depressed 
Green-
Is my favourite colour,
It reminds me of the fresh smells of summer
Mint teas and ink gems that are trade marked to my skin.
It is also the feeling of sickening dread 
The heavy pit in my stomach
At the thought;
Of going out there one more time
The penny's falling
Earned from the daily grind.

Colour me depressed
Purple-
Represents the bruises that cover me
From Head to toe, 
And heart to soul.
Where the thoughts inside my head
Leave me 
Drained and defeated.

Colour me depressed
Orange-
Is the sunrise
That I see each morning 
Today is a new day.
And sunset each night 
Today was a bad day.
The endless days circle round 
And collect like lead balls 
I pick up each day and put into my satchel of life,
365 days 29 years weighing me down 
Until my shoulder hunch over
My hair falling to mask my face.

Colour me depressed 
Blue-
Is emotionless ocean of waves
That crash over me,
You,
Them, us.
Dragging  down 
My legs kick out,
My arms strike out,
Trying to break free  out of this current
That is drowning me-
Grasping at my throat so I can not breath.
It is the small patch of sky
On the sunny days when my mind
Lets me breath and exhale a sigh of relief,
And I can tread water
Holding onto the rafts my family and friends 
Crafted,
To help me float.

Colour me depressed 
Grey-
Is for the areas when I don't know what to feel,
It's the numb 
Path that the medication has forged;
Each tiny tablet 
A stepping stone,
Bridging the gap from the grey havens 
To a normal functioning existence,
Where life is filled with biscuits and tea.

Colour me depressed
Black-
Is for the darkest days,
When you feel all hope is lost.
It's is the absence of colour,
Where you go and hide from everything
The darkest corners of your mind 
Where even the shadows hold each other's hands.

Depression is a rainbow,
And even the most broken palette 
Is beautiful in its own way.
So put on your wellies because 
You only get a rainbow 
After the storms and rain.